Rhi. (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
rhivolution) wrote2011-10-13 10:25 pm
rhivolution) wrote2011-10-13 10:25 pm
Entry tags:
Rhi rants about film, in small bite-size portions.
I have far more opinions, some of which are unpopular, than I anticipated.
- WHAT is the big hard-on for Tom Hardy? He has not been hot since he was Shinzon, in my mind, and yeah. I have never been one to give much of a shit about the 'bad boy/girl' or find it attractive--it strikes me as actually less so.
- The REMAKE ALL THE THINGS/TURN ALL THE THINGS INTO MOVIES trend may have actually reached its nadir with Footloose. Like, how does this even work? Also, I may have had Footloose confused in my head with Flashdance. No shame.
- Speaking of TURN ALL THE THINGS, I'm not super interested in The Avengers. Like, I would watch a film solely about Nick Fury, as I was discussing with several people on Tumblr. We've seen films about everyone else important, what's the point of Their Powers Combined?
- Woody Allen has made Owen Wilson into the Woody Allen character in Midnight in Paris. Great performance it may be, but it creeps me out even in the previews. Actually, nearly everything Woody Allen has made since the 70s creeps me out, and I liked Mighty Aphrodite. I think it's because Woody Allen has never really moved on FROM the 70s, truth be told.
- Three Musketeers looks like pure crap (vaguely steampunk? Paul WS Anderson? hell), but it has Matthew Macfadyen running around in it with a sword, with Orlando Bloom and Milla Jovovich as delightful side dishes, and if I had anyone to go with, I would be THERE. You may have realised by now that I would pay to see Macfadyen reading the Slough phone directory on-stage, much less a costumed crackfest. NO SHAME.
- I've got an invite to the Scottish premiere of We Need To Talk About Kevin, which is more of a big deal than it sounds due to director Lynne Ramsay being a Glasgow native, and there's a Q&A with her as part of it. I just don't know if I can bear the film due to the subject matter. I like films about painful issues as long as they're painful issues that could never be a problem for me.
- In Time might be Logan's Run remade for our times, but I am missing SF films in my life and would like one please. Inception made me realise how rarely we get a thoughtful non-series SF film, and while I don't expect anything of that calibre, I do want more SF.
And snippets:
- Contagion...looks really pretty, but it hits my OCD triggers a bit, and also I don't know if I can be bothered.
- What the fuck is Real Steel and who came up with that ridiculous title? I think I could take it more seriously as a boxing film or as an SF film or as a Hugh Jackman Beats Shit film if it didn't have a stupid title.
- Tintin: Oh Steven Spielberg, didn't Robert Zemeckis tell you how no one really likes performance capture (or, as we say in this flat, augh uncanny valley)? And how Jamie Bell is way too old for this role? Admittedly, I am a Thomas Sangster fan and have been since HN/FoB, but still.
- The Ides of March: yes please, if I can be arsed to go to a political thriller ever again.
- WHAT is the big hard-on for Tom Hardy? He has not been hot since he was Shinzon, in my mind, and yeah. I have never been one to give much of a shit about the 'bad boy/girl' or find it attractive--it strikes me as actually less so.
- The REMAKE ALL THE THINGS/TURN ALL THE THINGS INTO MOVIES trend may have actually reached its nadir with Footloose. Like, how does this even work? Also, I may have had Footloose confused in my head with Flashdance. No shame.
- Speaking of TURN ALL THE THINGS, I'm not super interested in The Avengers. Like, I would watch a film solely about Nick Fury, as I was discussing with several people on Tumblr. We've seen films about everyone else important, what's the point of Their Powers Combined?
- Woody Allen has made Owen Wilson into the Woody Allen character in Midnight in Paris. Great performance it may be, but it creeps me out even in the previews. Actually, nearly everything Woody Allen has made since the 70s creeps me out, and I liked Mighty Aphrodite. I think it's because Woody Allen has never really moved on FROM the 70s, truth be told.
- Three Musketeers looks like pure crap (vaguely steampunk? Paul WS Anderson? hell), but it has Matthew Macfadyen running around in it with a sword, with Orlando Bloom and Milla Jovovich as delightful side dishes, and if I had anyone to go with, I would be THERE. You may have realised by now that I would pay to see Macfadyen reading the Slough phone directory on-stage, much less a costumed crackfest. NO SHAME.
- I've got an invite to the Scottish premiere of We Need To Talk About Kevin, which is more of a big deal than it sounds due to director Lynne Ramsay being a Glasgow native, and there's a Q&A with her as part of it. I just don't know if I can bear the film due to the subject matter. I like films about painful issues as long as they're painful issues that could never be a problem for me.
- In Time might be Logan's Run remade for our times, but I am missing SF films in my life and would like one please. Inception made me realise how rarely we get a thoughtful non-series SF film, and while I don't expect anything of that calibre, I do want more SF.
And snippets:
- Contagion...looks really pretty, but it hits my OCD triggers a bit, and also I don't know if I can be bothered.
- What the fuck is Real Steel and who came up with that ridiculous title? I think I could take it more seriously as a boxing film or as an SF film or as a Hugh Jackman Beats Shit film if it didn't have a stupid title.
- Tintin: Oh Steven Spielberg, didn't Robert Zemeckis tell you how no one really likes performance capture (or, as we say in this flat, augh uncanny valley)? And how Jamie Bell is way too old for this role? Admittedly, I am a Thomas Sangster fan and have been since HN/FoB, but still.
- The Ides of March: yes please, if I can be arsed to go to a political thriller ever again.
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As for Avengers.... yeah. I'd be interested in a Nick Fury & Black Widow movie but everyone else.... yeah.
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(It's the way he writes women. And the way he positions his self-inserts in relation to women. Aggggggh.)
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What i really want, in my secretest dreams, is a movie about Nick Fury as established in Gaiman's "1602". Fury as Queen Elizabeth's spymaster?? MOAR PLS.
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I didn't find him attractive when he was thinner, and now he's all bulked up all the time and I just find that super DNW.
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Woody Allen is creepy, too. He's such a Nice Guy stereotype.
And finally, my god, what is it with boxing films. I don't get those at all. 'Real Steel' sounds, incidentally, like a bad scifi porno. :D
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Real Steel is just lucky it didn't have to call itself Rockem Sockem Robots: The Movie.
Also, there's a Logan's Run for today? I wasn't aware of this. D: It's rare that a week goes by without my saying "I hate Outside!"--I love Logan's Run way more than I probably should (though not quite as much as Soylent Green).
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* Last film I found her interesting in: Ghost World.
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If I were still in academia, I would have a really good essay to write about this.
* I say this like I've seen more of them than Annie Hall.
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I don't like the piece of meat thing either, mostly because my attraction to people I don't know IRL is very much an oh, ze is really nice to look at thing that is...sexual but not about sex. My brain is weird.
As noted above, there is a really good essay to be done on Woody Allen as Nice Guy and his portrayals of women impacting a certain genre of film. I don't really have it in me though.
Boxing films are all trying to be Rocky and failing.
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Classic case of personality getting in the way of talent.
(And I don't think you need to see more of them than Annie Hall.)
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I'm not sure how much In Time is like Logan's Run in reality (apparently a lot?), but the concept is, to me, pretty much what you'd get if you tried to make Logan's Run more relevant to a modern audience, e.g. with a focus on youth as commodity rather than the more nebulous reasoning for youth in the original.
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