rhivolution: Ace is pensive and/or upset (say your life is on fire: Ace)
Being super-cryptic about this, but lately on the interwebs with all of the fuckery going on both in the world and in community settings,* some people make me want to punch things. And I can't say anything to these people, e.g. PISS OFF, YOU DON'T HELP, because they are sort of Important and have cultural cachet and I may need to not have bad blood with them in future.

(I am, perhaps, too pragmatic about these things to be a real activist or interested in social justice, but I haven't ever claimed to be anything but a sell-out.)

We have been watching a lot of The A-Team lately, so basically my brain ends up wanting to non-lethally roll over cars and explode stuff on people, as well as quoting Hannibal and B.A., so.

Also, as usual, just reading about SDCC gives me anxiety. And then I get anxiety about not liking the idea of it and being a killjoy.

ANYWAY. In good things:
- I may need to post my Rule 63 in-period A-Team on Twitter because it's so necessary. The occasional thing like this is why I guess I need a Tumblr, but I cannae be bothered.
- I have yet to figure out why so many people follow me on Twitter in the first place. I suspect it's, as mentioned in previous post, because I'm a useful links aggregate and occasionally let out a bit of snark and that's it.
- I do quite enjoy a bit of my RPs right now.
- I actually finished reading a book! Which is good because my copy of Hild is in and I will pick it up and it will be lovely.
- I kinda want to reread Feed because it's the summer of 2014 and #wwyr is so wonderfully creepy.


* I have a lot to say about the Wiscon situation that I am not saying because it won't help anybody and also because I suspect no one cares what I think.
rhivolution: the Tenth Doctor, looking mightily pissed off (gonna cut you: the Tenth Doctor)
Just an FYI--I'm not reading much of LJ since they enforced the death of the friends page for me a few weeks back (despite saying they wouldn't, heyyyyy)--this new feed style is not good for my brain.

I have a cold. The world is fraying and everyone can see the seams. I keep nearly falling into the no, really, nobody cares what you think, you're useful primarily as an aggregator of other people's thoughts pit.

Then not wanting to say as much because it makes me sound needy and self-absorbed and there's far too much crap in the world for me to add to it.

Still grumpy. Still anxious. You've probably gathered all of that if you follow me on Twitter.

Still self-censoring.

gdi brain

Dec. 16th, 2013 12:11 am
rhivolution: concerned Eleventh Doctor and Idris, with text: 'nothing is impossible as long as we're alive' (unfettered and alive: Doctor/Idris)
Um, because I have had all the December things on my mind plus RP plot of doom plus being sick with the flu lately...I completely forgot who I asked for posts in the December posty thing.

So likely you have posted about something I asked for and I have not commented. and dear god, I don't want you to think I've forgotten entirely and am not interested. I just have been falling down massively on reading the follow circle of late and now it's gone too far past my flicking backwards in entries.

If I've failed, could you please shout in comments?
rhivolution: David Tennant, looking frustrated and holding up a sign that says 'ARSE' (u r a wanker: so says David Tennant)
Vaguely alarmed that Twitter AND LiveJournal were just both borked at the same time. I find this suspicious (especially since Twitter rarely failwhales much these days).

Or maybe someone's died? idk.

ANYWAY. HELLO. Autumnal is my word of the day.
rhivolution: Freema Agyeman is badass (save the time lord save the world: Marth)
If for some reason you missed it, I am [personal profile] rhivolution, Dreamwidth noobs.

I will be a bit busy the next few days, but I will try to add back asap. And if you have me friended on LJ but not DW, that's cool. I'll try not to feel hopelessly sad. [g]

I do not have to answer anyone's pay queries for the better part of a week thank god
rhivolution: the Doctor, pointing at his shop name badge: The Doctor/here to help (Here to help: The Doctor)
I'm not gonna get evangelical on you, and I recognise that some people are not keen on Dreamwidth for a myriad of reasons (some of which worry me too).

Just...the new LJ standard comment pages do not work for my brain. They really don't. They are not friendly to my ADD. And I really don't know what to do about it, RP-wise. I'll probably adjust, but it's going to be a massive headache in the meantime.

Please bear with me.

(Apparently the Russian userbase isn't thrilled either. Hmm.)

In other news, omg so tired.
rhivolution: Picard and Beverly get close in the TNG ep 'Attached' (UST; don't leave home without it: Picard)
Dearest internet, I have no good way of telling people when Twitter goes down, because TWITTER HAS GONE DOWN. So you get a post about it.

Oh, my soul.

Also, I have a migraine. And there is a new Simon's Cat. I'm tempted to update my icon with this year's holiday SC instead.


ETA: Twitter is back. I neglected to mention that like others, I'm remembering Russell Hoban, who I think of every time I eat bread or toast with jam. Seriously, every time.

Hoban had this to say about writing which is entirely too true:
I dont have nothing only words to put down on paper. Its so hard. Some times theres mor in the emty paper nor there is when you get the writing down on it. You try to word the big things and they tern ther backs on you. Yet youwl see stanning stoans and ther backs wil talk to you.
(Riddley Walker, 1983)

I sometimes wonder if I was the only person in Bill Oram's '04 class to get a lot out of that book...as a geek looking at language drift and cultural drift, I think it speaks more to me with a few years hindsight.
rhivolution: low-on-spoons girl from Hyperbole and a Half: 'clean ALL the things?' (clean ALL the things?: out of spoons)
Dear self, the reason no one is commenting on your posts lately on LiveJournal? Is because they aren't cross-posting due to you using the beta update page.

fuck's sake, self. moved them there now, in case you LJ people missed me.
rhivolution: David Tennant does the Thinker (Default)
Okay, seriously, I've restarted my browser, and I STILL can't see this Create Entry page that is apparently made of fairy farts and glitter.

Never mind. Thanks, [personal profile] lilmoka.
rhivolution: David Tennant does the Thinker (Default)
So, like [personal profile] kaz, sometimes people start following me and I get the notif, then promptly forget that I GOT the notif and don't follow people back.

Or I don't follow back/give access because I haven't got to know someone yet, etc.

Please feel free to comment, to introduce yourself, or just let me know you're here, especially if you'd like access to the locked things (mostly about RP or the dubiously legal). I love meeting new people.
rhivolution: David Tennant does the Thinker (Default)
Trying to x-post to LJ while I can, so I can update my friends, especially RP-based, who are there...

I've had nothing, not even patchy, over this DDoS, except for right now, where I can see LJ but can't leave any comments or switch my login for tags. Suffice it to say, I continue to be displeased.

I also continue to be posting here at Dreamwidth, just FYI.
rhivolution: Arthur Darvill in a wood panelled room, looking upwards thoughtfully (dreaming in colour: Arthur Darvill/Rory)
FYI, while LJ is apparently LOADING, it's not letting me SEE any posts. This seriously does a number on my RPing, as it likely has for many of you too. So I apologise for not responding to tags, but if I can't even see them to confirm they've gone through, I don't see much of a point.

And I wanted to do a Doctor EP, dammit.

Speaking of, Doctor Who S6b SDCC trailer isn't as inspiring as I anticipated--it's interesting, but not heartbreaking like I would want it to be and like the ones from S6a were. It's also not particularly...idek, coherent, in my mind; it does have a few threads I'd like to pull, but I have to wonder if I'm the only fan who is sick of spoiler ). We get it already, Moff, you are good at scary stuff or something.

Finally, two points regarding current events here in Europe:
- White people can be terrorists; also, this does not mean they are necessarily crazy.
- Yes, on a certain level, what happens to addicts is their own fault. But that doesn't mean that they deserve what happens.
rhivolution: David Tennant does the Thinker (Default)
My IBS hit me with a sucker punch this evening, as it does every few months, so this will not be overly coherent.

But today is my LiveJournal ([livejournal.com profile] rhipowered)'s tenth birthday, so please help me in singing a little birthday song for it and maybe fetching some fairy cakes.

It's been a hell of a ride so far, LJ (and DW) based fandom, and I am still happy to be a part of it!

also, i am twenty-seven when did that happen
rhivolution: David Tennant does the Thinker (Default)
(okay, not that old, I know, I know.)

[personal profile] lizbee's post reminded me that in a matter of days I will have had my LiveJournal for ten years. A decade.

To this, all I can say, really, is DANG.*


* If you follow me on Twitter, you will know about the history of 'dang'.
rhivolution: Terezi from Homestuck flying with her rocket wings (coolkid justice: Terezi (Homestuck))
Oi, LiveJournal, I'd really like to start getting my [livejournal.com profile] rhipowered notifs regularly again. You know, instead of a goddamn Farmville clone I won't be using? This is getting really, really old.

(For me, RP ones are fine, apparently.)

STRIFE. /Homestuck joke
rhivolution: Freema Agyeman is badass (save the time lord save the world: Marth)
So for a while I had a different persona when I did social justice stuff, because this was somewhat pre-Dreamwidth and I didn't really know how to integrate that into my LJ, etc.

And I made some nifty friends there, but as I've integrated SJ into fandomness and RLness, I sort of stopped using that name and fell into lurking (partially due to time constraints with grad school, partially to do with a lack of spoons). And now I run into people I know from there all the time and I want to be like O HAI, YOU ARE ACE, but it doesn't work that way. Especially since I sort of disappeared.

Sigh.

So I guess my question is...how do I come out? Do I come out at all?
rhivolution: low-on-spoons girl from Hyperbole and a Half: 'clean ALL the things?' (clean ALL the things?: out of spoons)
The whole piracy of ebooks thing...yeah.

[personal profile] vito_excalibur wrote a good post elucidating her position, a lot of which I agree with, and [livejournal.com profile] karenhealey said some stuff in response in the LJ comments that rang really wrong to me, but I couldn't really put my finger on why. I've come back after dinner to find some responses by [personal profile] deepad (The politics of discussing illegal file-sharing) and [personal profile] colorblue (this is not a post about yoga!) that are very good in pointing out just exactly what I hadn't quite processed: just how Western the concept of intellectual property rights is, as it exists now.

Additional posts on this topic can be found at [personal profile] troisroyaumes' roundup.

So, before I start talking about my own POV, please consider that there are other important viewpoints on the topic...but those non-Western views dovetail with my own concept.

-----
I find it really problematic to say that you shouldn't access books illegally at all, full stop.

Firstly, I was fortunate enough to grow up in an area with a really good public library system, then went to college in an area with a fairly good library system as well; both are in the US.* Therefore, I have been privileged enough to expect to read nearly anything I want for free, given time and patience. And frankly, while in the US, I never really had the money to buy as many new books as I read, considering the cost of hardcovers and trade paperbacks even before the advent of ebooks. (I read a LOT.)

This is generally true of me overall: I don't like to buy things I don't want to own and consume again. Period.

In comparison to my past experience, the UK library system has been lacking. Birmingham was quite bad, Glasgow is better but not as good as what I'd like. According to people I've spoken to--anecdotal, but a variety of people nonetheless--the system is not as good as it was decades ago. And now, government cuts are suspected to be ripping the remaining guts out sooner rather than later.

So yeah, go ahead, tell me to make a request at my library, so they can buy a copy of your book so I can read it. They won't laugh in my face, exactly.

Assuming they can even buy a copy of your book at all, which brings me to my second point.

I now live in Britain (still Western, still with a high standard of living), but many books, even on major publishers, do not always come out here, and vice versa. (There are, for example, loads of books by FSF author Gwyneth Jones that are on a major UK imprint but completely inaccessible in the US. There's also a Jones book on Aqueduct Press that doesn't have a UK publisher, but I don't blame Aqueduct for that, it being indie.) And I really can't afford the absolutely ridiculous cost of buying from the US and shipping. Most people I know don't have that kind of expendable income. And I'm not sure why Karen Healey didn't really address this very satisfactorily (imho) in her own post.

This is not the authors' fault, but the fault of the publishing industry. What needs to be done, in my mind, is what needs to be done with television: a revision and opening of international licensing, as well as a revision of ereader accessibility and restriction. (I mean, I'd like something better, like government-funded universal library access and Creative Commons reuse/remix stuff. But that ain't happening in the current socioeconomic model.)

So...I'm kinda descending into incoherency and must sum up: I don't want to whinge about how I can't get a bunch of books...though, frankly, it frustrates me on a regular basis.

Instead, there's a deeper issue here of which my life only skims the surface due to privilege: saying that piracy is universally terrible and what...it's not good, but there is often no other access option. (Now, you don't want to go wave that in an author's face, that's just fucking stupid. And, as I noted, most authors can do fuck-all about the situation anyway.) In a globalised society, seeing reviews and recs for things dangling out of the reach of people with limited funds or not in the US stings like hell. You have to globalise access, and not just to the Western world, either.

Kinda comes down to bread and roses, friends. Bread and roses.

ETA: I believe everyone should have access to information if they want it. Less about entitlement, more about fulfilling the bullshit lip service towards this sort of thing that's been going on for ages.

* I'm not fond of US government/bureaucracy overall; this is actually probably the biggest thing I miss from the US system. Except perhaps the US Postal Service.
rhivolution: low-on-spoons girl from Hyperbole and a Half: 'clean ALL the things?' (clean ALL the things?: out of spoons)
Always sorta weirded out when random followers-of-followers-of-followers follow me after I've been RTed for one of my momentary bursts of 140 character 'insight'. I feel like I should be an influential blogger, or at least hardcore into my Tumblr or something. I want to shout I AM NOT ALWAYS THIS INTERESTING, PEOPLE.

But I guess they figure that out eventually.

I don't have any words left about the shooting in Tucson at the moment, though. You can go read them on Twitter. Save that I am, once again, really fucking sad and concerned about the state of affairs in my home nation.

I am now drinking and playing casual games instead, because otherwise I'll just listen to Lindsey Buckingham on repeat and worry that I'll cry a little more. Much as that sounds like hyperbole, it is actually trufax.
rhivolution: Ace is pensive and/or upset (say your life is on fire: Ace)
So I keep mulling over the idea that I should change my Tumblr or get a second one to talk about political stuff. Because it seems like that is where All The Discourse is happening in real time these days, and then I get lost and confused when people bring stuff up here or on Twitter.

Except when I think about it hard enough, I realise that that wouldn't be good for my brain.

Because, see, Tumblr for me works really well to post pictures of sexy people and cute animals and ridiculous stuff and the occasional thought too long for Twitter. But I find it really intensely difficult to follow all the intricacies of a complicated discussion on there. I need responses and discussion on one page or with a diagram with easy to follow hyperlinks like a branching tree. For me, the Tumblr method is great for clicking about, a la a bored day of Wikipedia surfing, but I can't read it for srs bsns unless I'm sticking to one person.

Otherwise I miss stuff that's really vitally important and don't have the spoons to go chasing it down. Hell, I neglect to answer LJ/DW comments and I get emails about those, ffs.

It's not Tumblr, it's me. My brain is borked. It's a self-realisation that is awkward as hell. And I'm angry at myself for not getting it because there is interesting shit going on that I'm missing.

More on the psychiatrist later.